Assess Your Relationship
Is My Relationship Headed In The Right Direction Or Is It In Trouble?
Answer each question with a Y, “yes” or N “no”.
1. My spouse and I generally know what is happening in each other‘s
life.
2. We laugh together and are generally in a good mood.
3. We touch each other with love during each day.
4. Neither I nor my spouse are often irritable or in a bad mood.
5. We can control our temper, take a time out, if necessary, and work
through disagreements in healthy ways.
6. We do not let small issues escalate into bigger ones.
7. We regularly find time to be together and, when we do, we enjoy
each other’s company.
8. When we disagree, we find ways to “repair the damage” to our
relationship.
9. Neither of us would describe ourselves as feeling lonely.
10. My spouse and I both respect and feel respected in this marriage.
11. There is a lot more positive than negative in our relationship.
12. We do not keep secrets from each other.
13. We are “friends” on face book, have access to each other’s email
and cell phones, but really feel no need to check up on each other.
Neither one of us has given the other reason to lose trust.
14. We would agree that there is a lot to be grateful for in our lives.
15. While there has been a lot of stress in our lives lately, we have
worked through it together and would both describe our relationship
as stronger.
16. We connect. We rarely feel like two ships just passing in the night.
17. We are emotionally present for each other.
18. When we talk with our friends about each other, 90% of it is only
positive, not complaints.
19. While we know that some problems may never have a solution,
neither of us feels like we just have not resolved an issue very
often.
Scoring
If you have checked N “no” to more than 4 of these questions, you and your spouse should gently talk about the state of your marriage and how you might get it in a better spot.
If problems are allowed to hang around then they can grow and multiply. With time, loneliness and distance become frequent feelings and marriages experience even bigger problems.
