(WHAS11) - In this part of the WHAS11 series called Black and White in Kentuckiana, we're taking a closer look at the black family and the cycle of single parent homes that's plaguing the black community.
WHAS11’s Adrianna Hopkins talked to single parents and someone who's working to keep fathers in the home. She also looked at why this is happening.
It may not look like young sisters Anaya and Amari would have much in common with teenage siblings, Jada and Brian but they do.
They're all part of a cycle; African American children growing up in a single parent homes, without a father.
Their mothers have a lot in common too.
Ashley Martin and Shawn Moore both got pregnant young, and say they were naive.
Both of them say their children's fathers are not very involved in their lives.
"For them to be growing up in the world that we are in today without a father, that's a tremendous loss for them. I never wanted them to be this way,” says Ashley Martin.
But these mothers can't provide an explanation as to why the men have checked out. They say the fathers live in the same city as their kids but choose not to come around.
"My human side gets frustrated, but for the most part, I've stopped trying to figure it out,” says Shawn Moore.
Neither of these mothers wanted to continue this cycle.
The absence of a father doesn't go unnoticed by the children.
"They notice it a lot. Amari notices it around Christmastime, her birthday. When she goes to school and some of the kids’ fathers may drop them off,” says Ashley Martin.
"I'm hurting a little when I think how come I can't have a man to teach me how to shoot my jump shot or teach me how to drive, or tell me about girls and other stuff,” says teenager Brian.
"I can't control that you and my mom didn't stay together, but I'm what keeps you together, so you could give some effort," says Brian’s sister Jada.
Roughly 80% of African American students in Jefferson County Public Schools are living a single parent household and it's a problem that spans generations.
Both Ashley and Shawn were raised solely by their mothers.
So where does the cycle start, how does it stop?
"I think the cycle starts because of the mentality the men have. You know, just set in their mind, my father wasn't there for me, why should I be there for mine?" says Ashley.
Shawn Gardner is the president and founder of 2 not 1: Fatherhood and Families hosts an annual program of lectures, classes, and discussions to address the issue of absentee fathers.
He says fathers fit into one of three categories: those who are absent; those who are involved; and those who want to be involved but have barriers.
“We have what we call barriers to opportunity; prisoner re-entry, mental health, child support and healthy relationships,” says Shawn Gardner.
His goal is to identify the barrier, not the excuse and provide a solution. Because he says all too often society writes a man off, without realizing they probably didn't have a father to know what it is to be a father.
William Marshall has three little girls and says he's a father who wants to be involved but his barrier is an ongoing custody battle.
"I'm not going to say that it's something that's only assumed of black men, but of all men; that when problems arise they're out the door and when they're out the door they don't want anything to do with anybody. And that's not always the case,” says William Marshall.
But for Ashley or Shawn there's no custody battle or court hearings separating their children from their fathers.
"You can't blame the woman; you have to blame the man because he's not there. He took on the role to not be there," says Ashley.
They both say that their new goal is for the cycle of absent fathers to stop with them.
